Brave

As you may (or may not!) already know, I quit my job. My last day of employment is officially October 9, 2009--that's one week! People keep asking me why I would quit a "perfectly good job" in an economic environment like this one, where people everywhere are clinging hopelessly to ANY job they can get.

via flikr

And my answer is simply that I am not fulfilled in this job. Yes, I make money. Yes, I have health insurance. Yes, I have my very own office. But when it comes right down to it, I can get those things in many places and many different positions--what I am looking for right now is a JOB or a CAREER that leaves me excited to get up in the morning, where I feel like my energy is making a positive contribution to society and the world.

There is a Buddhist philosophy that thinks that every person born into this world is equally capable of good or evil, and which part is expressed depends on the society and circumstances into which the child is born. If a child is born into a group of people who are unhappy and not contributing positively, then he is less likely to manifest the good and happy in his potential, and so forth. By that theory, every unhappy person in this world makes the world a worse place. So I am trying to change my circumstances so that I may be a more fulfilled and productive individual.

I keep waffling between thinking, "I am so happy that I have taken this negative out of my life and made room to fill it with positives. I rock!" and thinking "wow, you are so stupid! what are you thinking?"

But what people keep telling me is that I am BRAVE. So I started thinking about the word "brave." Is that what brave means? Happy, fierce, and stupid? So I looked it up. Here is what dictionary.com had to say:

Brave. Syn.: bold, intrepid, daring, dauntless, heroic.
"Brave," "courageous," "valiant," "fearless," and "gallant" refer to confident bearing in the face of difficulties or dangers.
"Brave" is the most comprehensive: it is especially used of that confident fortitude or daring that actively faces and endures anything threatening."

I think I like that! "Confident fortitude or daring that actively faces and endures anything threatening." I am going to keep that in mind as I face the next few weeks.